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Things You Can't Do on a Plane: Vol. 20

You might think that after Volume 1Volume 2Volume 3Volume 4Volume 5Volume 6Volume 7Volume 8, Volume 9Volume 10Volume 11Volume 12Volume 13Volume 14Volume 15Volume 16Volume 17Volume 18 and Volume 19 of Things You Can't Do on a Plane, that we'd have exhausted the list of things you can't do on a plane. Nope! The list grows daily.

Here are three more things I've recently learned that you cannot do on a plane:

  • Wear a shirt revealing your cleavage (for women). Female passengers may not wear a cleavage-baring shirt, even if the flight is departing from a town in the desert on a hot day. CONSEQUENCE: Gate worker will demand that passenger button up her shirt if she wants to board the flight.
  • Punch a fellow passenger, yell profanities at other passengers and air crew, and punch the seats in front of you in a violent manner (for grandmothers). Punching passengers and seats is prohibited, as is cursing out the air crew mid-flight. This prohibition applies equally to drunken grandmothers, as well. CONSEQUENCEPilot will turn flight around and land plane, and passenger will be restrained and removed from plane upon landing. 
  • Refuse to sit upright and wear seatbelt as instructed during takeoff (for toddlers). Three-year-old passengers may not disregard the captain's instructions to sit upright and keep their seatbelt on. CONSEQUENCE: Pilot will return the plane to the gate, and toddler and his entire family will be removed from plane.

Posted by Bruce Carton on June 20, 2012 at 04:14 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)


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