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Thursday's Three Burning Legal Questions

Here are today's three burning legal questions, along with the answers provided by the blawgosphere.

1) Question: My wife is getting really angry at me for staring at the chest of the female passenger next to me on this flight. I told her it is for safety reasons, but she is not buying that. Can you help?

Answer: Stay vigilant, sir. The risks of explosive breast implants are not yet widely known to the public. If you stop staring, the terrorists win.(WorldNetDaily, Bosom Bombers: Women Have Explosive Breast Implants)

Party 2) Question: For years, I have fought for my "right to party." Now I'm hearing rumors that there is no such right? Can it be?

Answer: It's no rumor, unfortunately. (See URI Student Senate v. Narragansett (D.R.I.), Footnote 4 ("In other words, while the Beastie Boys might disagree, the First Amendment does not imply a “right to party” dissociated from expression"))

3) Question: Some do-gooder just came up and punched me in the face, completely disrupting my effort to rob an 83-year-old man. I'm furious! That's got to be assault or something, right? Should I call the police?

Answer: That may well have been an assault, but you may want to look at the bigger picture here before you dial 9-1-1. (SignOnSanDiego, Bad Move: Robber Calls Police Himself)

Posted by Bruce Carton on February 4, 2010 at 03:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

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