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Things You Can't Do on a Plane: Vol. 21

You might think that after Volume 1Volume 2Volume 3Volume 4Volume 5Volume 6Volume 7Volume 8, Volume 9Volume 10Volume 11Volume 12Volume 13Volume 14Volume 15Volume 16Volume 17Volume 18Volume 19 and Volume 20 of Things You Can't Do on a Plane, that we'd have exhausted the list of things you can't do on a plane. Nope! The list grows daily.

Here are three more things I've recently learned that you cannot do on a plane:

  • Tell passengers after a 4 1/2 hour delay that they can deplane if they "have the balls to want to get off." Flight attendants may not announce over the intercom after a lengthy delay that "if anyone has the balls to want to get off, I'll let you get off! Get off!" CONSEQUENCE: Flight attendant will be removed from the flight for questioning. 
  • Force a passenger to sit across from a corpse on a 10-hour international flight. In the event of a passenger's death during a flight, flight attendants should not require other passengers to sit across the aisle from the corpse for the rest of the trip. CONSEQUENCEAirline will apologize and refund about half the cost of the passenger's $1,400 ticket.
  • Board a plane with a vital organ larger than the 100 ml limit for a liquid. Passengers may not board a plane with a trachea seeded with 60 million stem cells that must be implanted within 16 hours if the bottle exceeds 100 ml. CONSEQUENCE: Passenger will need to find another small jet to fly the container at a cost of $21,000. 

Posted by Bruce Carton on July 13, 2012 at 04:04 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)


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