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Things You Can't Do on a Plane: Vol. 26

You might think that after Volume 1Volume 2Volume 3Volume 4Volume 5Volume 6Volume 7Volume 8Volume 9Volume 10Volume 11Volume 12Volume 13Volume 14Volume 15Volume 16Volume 17Volume 18Volume 19Volume 20Volume 21Volume 22Volume 23Volume 24 and Volume 25 of Things You Can't Do on a Plane, that we'd have exhausted the list of things you can't do on a plane. Nope! The list grows daily.

Here are three more things I've recently learned that you cannot do on a plane:

  • Disrupt the flight and try to open the plane door mid-flight (while on Day 50 of a drinking binge). Passengers on a 50-day drinking binge may not wake up during the plane's descent, start yelling in Russian, try to open the rear door and then offer federal agents $6,534 to let them go. CONSEQUENCE: Passenger will be charged with damaging and disabling an aircraft, interfering with a flight crew, bribing a public official, and assaulting and resisting officers.
  • Get drunk and carjack someone in the airport parking lot (for pilots). Pilots with 12 hours to kill before their next flight may not get drunk and enter the backseat of an occupied rental car, get into a fight with the occupant and then drive away in that person's car. CONSEQUENCE: Pilot will be arrested and charged with car theft and DUI.
  • Pace the airplane aisles verbally and physically harassing female passengers. Passengers may not get drunk and walk about the plane behaving aggressively and grabbing women. CONSEQUENCE: Passenger will be tackled by fellow passengers and then held down with their belts for nearly three hours until the plane lands and police arrive.

Posted by Bruce Carton on November 6, 2012 at 04:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

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