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Things You Can't Do on a Plane: Vol. 28

You might think that after Volume 1Volume 2Volume 3Volume 4Volume 5Volume 6Volume 7Volume 8Volume 9Volume 10Volume 11Volume 12Volume 13Volume 14Volume 15Volume 16Volume 17Volume 18Volume 19Volume 20Volume 21Volume 22Volume 23Volume 24Volume 25Volume 26 and Volume 27 of Things You Can't Do on a Plane, that we'd have exhausted the list of things you can't do on a plane. Nope! The list grows daily.

Here are three more things I've recently learned that you cannot do on a plane:

  • Smuggle a tiger's penis into the Australian airport. Passengers may not smuggle a tiger's penis into Australia. The same is true of whole skinned frogs, a bear's gall bladder, and a witch doctor's bag with dead rodents attached. CONSEQUENCE: Tiger's penis will be seized by Australian authorities.
  • Get drunk and go on a "rampage" on an international flight. Passengers are prohibited from becoming intoxicated and hitting, screaming at and spitting on other passengers. CONSEQUENCE: Passenger will be "constrained to his seat with duct tape" by his angry fellow passengers. 
  • Get drunk, board your plane and prepare for takeoff (for pilots). Pilots may not board their own flight smelling of alcohol and then fail a Breathalyzer testCONSEQUENCE: Pilot will be arrested and suspended from the airline pending an investigation.

Posted by Bruce Carton on January 7, 2013 at 04:46 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

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